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101 Bone Puns That Are Real Spine Ticklers

Hip and Happening Bone Puns 

We’re not being faux-knee when we say our bone puns are real spine ticklers! They’re hip and are sure to crack you up. 

Hot Bone Puns For A Femur

  1. What’s it called when you hit your funny bone late at night? Dark humor. 
  2. Did you hear about the femur who had no friends? He was very bonely. 
  3. What’s another word for an atheist bone? A blas-femur. 
  4. What did the femur say to the tibia when he proposed? Please will you marrow me?
  5. Why did the dog get picked to join the marching band? Because he was an expert at playing the trombone!
  6. Why do so many people enjoy puns about bones? Because they’re so humerus!
  7. How can you tell whether someone has a sense of humor? By checking the condition of their funny bone. 
  8. I used to crack a lot of jokes about bones, but my supply appears to have dried up. I guess I wasn’t that femurous after all!
  9. Why did the tailbone start a fight? Because he had a serious bone to pick. 
  10. Why did the little rib’s mom rush him to the doctor? Because he was running a femur. 
  11. Why was the skull sentenced to jail-time? Because he was bad to the bone. 
  12. What did the kneecap use to phone his girlfriend? He called her on his cell-bone.  
  13. Why did the spine feel offended by his doctor? Because he got told he was irregular.
  14. How did the tailbone achieve so much success as a comedian? He had a skele-ton of jokes up his sleeve. 
  15. What do you get when you boil a funny bone? Laughing stock!
  16. What did the tailbone tell the femur when her sweetheart died? I’m sorry for your loss, but everything’s going tibia okay. 
  17. Why did the backbone giggle each time he saw the orthopedic surgeon? Because he’s a real spine tickler. 
  18. Why are rib cages such terrible liars? Because you can see right through them.
  19. What’s a femur’s favourite type of plant? A bone-zai.
  20. What’s the best way to discipline a naughty kneecap? Lock him up in a rib cage for detention. 

Romantic Bone Puns

  1. You’re giving me femur!
  2. Bone Appetit, because baby you look good enough to eat!
  3. You’re so beautiful, it’s shin-ful.
  4. I ulna want to be with you!
  5. Have I told you lately that I knee-d you?
  6. Baby, I’ll always have your back!
  7. Are you sure you ain’t a queen? Because you deserve a crown. 
  8. I’ll always find it easy tibia honest with you.
  9. Nobody knee-ds to know this, but I’ve liked you for a really long time!
  10. I really like you, even know I know you’re too hipbone for me!

Make No Bones About These Bone Puns

  1. The rib cage loves going to church. Every Sunday he plays his organ for the congregation. 
  2. Backbones are great at chopping down trees. That’s why they make such terrific lumbar-jacks. 
  3. Many bones have tried to be cool. But none have managed to even get close to the hip bone. 
  4. My bones are rebels without a cause. They’re bone tibia wild!
  5. My dog’s favorite book is Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Bone.
  6. I ordered a bunch of bones for my dog online. They weighed a skele-ton!
  7. I’m not sure how many bones there are in the human hand, but I’m sure it’s at least a handful. 
  8.  I went to the doctor offering to donate by body to science when I die. He told me to spine on the dotted line. 
  9. I went to a skeleton beauty contest. It was a waste of time because no body won. 
  10. I saw a snake as thin as a bone once, it gave me a huge fright. It was a rattler. 

These Bone Puns Ain’t For Boneheads 

  1. Where’s the best place to learn about bones? In Osteoclass-t. 
  2. Did you hear about the time the tibia and the femur had such a great time? They had an osteoblast. 
  3. Why was the skeleton so stupid? He was a real numskull. 
  4. Why are bones always so calm? Nothing gets under their skin!
  5. Why is the ribcage always cold in winter? Because the wind blows right through him. 
  6. Did you hear about the tailbone that almost got eaten by a pack of wild dogs? He only marrow-ly escaped. 
  7. Why are hip bones so bad at winning arguments? Because without support, they haven’t got a leg to stand on. 
  8. Why is the orthopedic surgeon so good at his job? He’s constantly boning up on the facts. 
  9. Why was the femur so grateful to his boss? Because he gave him a bone-us. 
  10. Why was the femur searching his house from top to bottom? Because his wife was nowhere tibia found!

Puns As Old As The Bone Age

  1. That femur is always winning competitions. He must have been bone under a lucky star. 
  2. It’s rude to hang up the tele-bone when someone hasn’t finished talking. 
  3. The book wasn’t all it was cracked up tibia. 
  4. You’ve got tibia kidding me!
  5. The hip bone may be cool, but he’s got no social skulls.
  6. The little rib is good at playing football. He loves to dribble the ball!
  7. It’s best to keep on the straight and marrow.
  8. To-marrow is another day. 
  9. I saw you at my window, were you spine on me?
  10. She looked absolutely fibulous!
  11. I really wish you’d stop telling so many fibulas!
  12. Oh well, I guess it’s back to the jawing board then!
  13. He’s a criminal! Sternum in to the police!
  14. You had better watch your backbone out there. 
  15. The little hipbone loved baking brow-knees. 
  16. The pair of fibulas have given birth to a lovely bundle of joy-nt. 

Celebrity Bone Puns

  1. Ulna Thurman. 
  2. Sherlock Bones. 
  3. Jacks Marrow.
  4. Bury White.
  5. Teddy Bones-evelt. 
  6. Clarence Marrow.
  7. Jon Bone Jovi
  8. Indiana Bones
  9. Mr. Bone Jangles
  10. Ben Rattling.
  11. Boney Wan Kenobi
  12. Val Killmore.
  13. Count Scapula
  14. Marty McFright
  15. Jerry Spinefeld
  16. Humphrey Bonegart
  17. Abby Cadaver
  18. Dee Ceased
  19. Bona Lisa
  20. Jessica Bones
  21. Dana Skully
  22. Grace Skelly
  23. Skelly Clarkson
  24. Meryl Shriek
  25. Helen Skeller

These Blarney Pun Bones!

  1. She’s very judgmental, always casting the first bone.
  2. You can’t get blood out of a bone!
  3. He lived only bone’s throw from me.
  4. He really is a man after my bone heart!
  5. All young skulls must learn to paddle their bone canoes!
  6. We’re currently in the eastern time bone.
  7. She’s so old-fashioned, she must have been born in the bone age!
  8. Those skulls are in a league of their bone.
  9. Baby, I’m in the bone!
  10. Bone the night!

Now that you’ve met our awesome cast of puns about bones, we’re quite sure you’ll agree that punning about with bones can be a real shindig!